Four
During my time at Circle in the Square Theater School (September 2015-June 2017), I witnessed many instances of misconduct (mental, sexual, and racial) aimed at my classmates, as well as myself. I won’t speak on anyone else’s behalf, but I will speak on my own personal experiences.
One incident immediately comes to mind. It happened one afternoon during our First Year Scene Study class. I had brought in a scene from the musical Spring Awakening. The scene opens with Melchior, the character I was working on, reading a book. It got off to a fairly normal start, but was abruptly stopped by the instructor conducting the class. He began asking questions about what book I thought the character might be reading. I, admittedly, hadn’t put much thought into it, and made that known. He then proceeded to (not so subtly) skirt around the idea of what he thought the book might be about. If you know the show (and I’m sure you do), you know that it is very sexually charged. Being aware of this, I immediately picked up on what he was hinting at and was more than uncomfortable with the situation. I didn’t want to say what I knew that he wanted me to say; a conclusion that he wanted me to “come to on my own”, for obvious reasons. I stayed silent for so long that he finally gave in and said, outright, “It’s a book of pornography.” This, while not being the most audacious of things ever said to a student studying theatre, threw me for a loop. I was quite visibly uneasy with the situation. He continued on, suggesting that the character was more than likely experimenting sexually in the moment. He implied that he was “probably” touching himself. I was stunned. I froze, not knowing what to do. I did not want to do what he was asking me to do. However, had I said no, I would have been labeled as “not able to take direction”, and that information would have surely been used against me, as was customary. And so I did. I touched myself. As I’ve said, the play is very sexually charged. However, nowhere in the text does it allude to that sort of thing, but he was the “professional” and was able to understand the “subtext”. This happened in front of my entire class. It was highly demoralizing and far from necessary.
Along with this, I would like to point out the severe lack of mental healthcare services provided to the students attending Circle. An institution that delves deep into Stanislavski’s method of acting (a method that “activates the actor’s psychological processes–such as emotional experience and subconscious behavior”) should have a mental health counselor on staff, plain and simple. I was told, daily, to “open myself up” emotionally and was reprimanded for being hesitant to do so. After finally giving in, as someone who had dealt with mental health issues before coming to Circle, it proved to be actively dangerous to my mental and physical health. It took a very big toll. So much so, that I was regularly approached by instructors urging me to seek out professional help. I took this advice very seriously, but had no resources to do so. I was lost. I was in serious danger.
I would like to be very clear in saying that I am in no way implying that attending Circle in the Square Theater School was the cause of my mental health issues. That would be irresponsible and slanderous on my part. However, an institution that urges the act of “taking yourself apart” and looking at the pieces should be better equipped in helping to put their students back together.
Change is needed to ensure a long and prosperous future for Circle in the Square and it needs to be addressed. Now.
— William Holden Cox